Poppy Payne IS The Sexy Techie!

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Anti Virus Conspiracy

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Computer virus stupidityDo I believe there is an Anti-Virus conspiracy afoot? Let me put it this way: I am sick and tired of software companies pissing on me and trying to tell me it’s fucking raining. Just so there is no misunderstanding, let me make this clear. I am not against anti-virus software. My problem is with the companies themselves. Let me tell you a little story. About five years ago, one of my systems got hit with a particularly nasty virus called ‘Virtua.monde’ I was running Symantec Anti-Virus at the time ans although the system exhibited every symptom of a viral infection, Symantec insisted there was nothing wrong. Being the geek I am, I ran SpyBot Search & Destroy which found Virtua.monde, but could not get rid of it. This surprised me as SpyBot had never let me down before. After a bit of research on the Internet, I found that Spyware Doctor with Anti-Virus from PC Tools claimed to be able to handle it. I gave them a shot and lo and behold, it found the infection and cleared it. Spyware Doc cost half of what Symantec was charging and better than that, it was leaner, meaner and faster than Symantec. Life is good.

Two blondesUnfortunately, three years ago, Symantec bought PC Tools. And as Symantec is wont to do, they took a great application, made it their own and in my opinion, ruined it like they have for every product they acquired. Remember Norton Ghost? PC Anywhere? Veritas Backup Exec? In a few short years, Spyware Doctor became a bloated, slow, more expensive, questionably effective resource hog. The last scan of my PC took 23 hours to run. That is ridiculous! To add insult to injury, my experience (as well as thousands of others according to web posts) has been that after every one of the last four upgrades, I end up with a recurring BSOD naming PCTOOL.SYS as the culprit. PC Tools Tech Support claimed there was no issue. However, there is always a patch issued a few months later that makes the blue screens go away. The blue screens that PC Tools says aren’t happening. A new version of PC Tools came out a few weeks ago and guess what? My old friend the BSOD came back with it.

Heavenly workplace!Here is my solution. As much as I don’t believe for a moment that Microsoft is an altruistic and/or philanthropic organization, their FREE Anti-Virus product, Microsoft Security Essentials, has received almost universal positive reviews as the best of the free Anti-Virus applications available. Is it as good as the top rated paid anti-virus applications? Nope. But it IS effective, it is free and it was designed by people who know the Windows O/S inside and out. IMHO, coupled with MalwareBytes Anti-Malware, we may finally have an approach that will be hard to beat and won’t make my eight i7 cores with 16GB of memory run like a a Z80 (Look it up! Google is your friend!).

If you have any comments about this article, pro or con, bring ’em on. I love hearing from you and I want to know what you think.

Love ya, Poppy xxxxx

Valetine’s Day Sucks!

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Valentine's Day Sucks There. It needed to be said and I said it. Valentine’s Day Sucks. Sucks the big one. What other holiday is expressly designed to make make people who aren’t in a relationship feel like a total shit? Here comes Valentine’s Day where we remind you that you do not count because you don’t have anyone in your life, loser! But those who are in a relationship don’t get off scot-free. The holiday also infers that you can be a total asshole all year as long as you remember to buy a card, some flowers and a box of stale chocolates on this one day. Bollocks! If you love someone, you should be expressing it all year long and I do not mean by gifts, but by your words and actions, and those words and actions should be from the heart, not because you feel obligated.

Take That, Bitch!WARNING!!! EDUCATIONAL CONTENT!! While Valentine’s Day has become grossly over commercialized, contrary to popular thought, it was not created by the greeting card, florist or candy industries.The Bishop of Rome, a priest by the name of Valentine, was in the habit of performing marriage ceremonies for young couples way back in 462 AD. The only problem was this was expressly forbidden by Emperor Claudius II. Valentine was arrested, tried and found guilty… He suffered the usual punishment of being drawn and quartered.

There was an ancient Roman festival that fell on the 13th, 14th and 15th of February which was a huge fertility celebration known as Lupercalia, which more or less was an excuse for everyone to fuck their brains out. In 492 AD, Pope Gelasius abolished Lupercalia and created Valentine’s day. It more or less remained a fuck fest until the 1600s when the concept of romanticism took over and people began exchanging home made cards and gifts. Mass production began in 1847 throughout Europe and the States which more or less brings us to today where 25% of all greeting cards per year are for Valentine’s Day and the number of cards (if you include the ones made in schools) is around the 1 Billion mark. In the western world, Valentine’s Day accounts for 5.1% of the yearly candy sales, which is still 58.3 million pounds of candy. Flowers? 12% of yearly sales.

Sez it all!In 1969, under Pope Paul VI, the Catholic Church revamped their Saints Calendar with the result that St. Valentine’s Day was removed as a church wide remembrance, leaving it to individual countries and churches to celebrate or not as they saw fit.

END OF EDUCATIONAL CONTENT AND BACK TO MY RANT!!! So if you love your significant other, forget the 14th of February and let them know it all the year long. If you really need an excuse to get laid once a year, you’ve got other issues you’re gonna have to deal with. And if you need that box of candy or you want a vase full of dead flowers, buy them on the 15th when they’re at half price!

Love you all, and not just on February 14th!

Poppy xxxxxxx

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